China

The title of this blog actually should be “Hong Kong,” followed by a separate blog for “China,” since Hong Kong is technically a SAR (Special Administrative Region) of China…I don’t understand it either. Don’t bother googling it, it won’t help. Anyway, we pulled into Hong Kong amid the most densely-packed skyscrapers I’ve seen in quite some time. I love cities so it already started the Parent Trip out on the right foot for me. As we pulled in I saw my mom, the tallest woman in the whole group. She’ll deny it…it’s true. She boarded the boat and we did a brief tour as the sun tried to poke its head out for us. Our first activity was taking the tram up Victoria Hill for the iconic view of HK and Kowloon that comes up whenever you google Hong Kong. I could already tell this country would be a whole new breed when, upon arrival, we were greeted by a Starbucks and a Burger King instead of hawkers. After inhaling a deep breath and the accompanying smell of globalization at its finest, we traveled back down the hill and over to a fishing village, but only if in this case “fishing” means “shopping.” Seriously, it was just a market.

            Our next stop was a harbor, where we took a traditional Chinese boat around all the fishing boats, house boats and multi-million dollar yachts. We passed a particularly interesting building with a hole built through the middle of it. Our tour guide informed us that…well, I’m not quite sure what she said. But it was something about how the residents want to keep the dragon happy. Or the dragon would hit the building if it didn’t have a hole. I’m not sure. I still don’t know if this dragon is metaphorical or not but that’s ok. Our evening concluded with a booze cruise around HK Harbor (what my mom described as a “Nighttime cruise.”) After that we stuck around for the laser light show that happens every night. It’s even choreographed to music. How cool does that sound!? It wasn’t. But we did stumble on what looked like China’s American Idol. We got dinner at “Peking Garden,” home of the famous 11-course meal. I stuck to deep-fried chicken (can I get a hallelujah!) and beer. Maybe that wasn’t enough because when it came time to get the check, we became invisible. Seriously, I’m 6’7” and we were in China. I know he saw us. So 30 minutes later we paid our bill and went on our merry way.

            We flew to Beijing the next day where our first activity was hiking on some little stone fence. Yawn. No seriously, it was SO cool. No pictures can ever realistically portray just how huge this thing is. Plus my mom got her first experience bartering…well I bartered and she mostly watched, but it’s true that it is really intimidating. The next one was about half me and half her, and by the end she got two purses all by herself! They grow up so fast… I’m also going to take this opportunity to share with you the first of two AWESOME English translations…it was on a customized car and the back window read:

“To every way For showing your dignity We have tuned up all parts of the car in a supreme ways. U who respect the value of LUXURY are the genuine VIPs. “Your Free Style”, We’re trying to make your dignity more LUXURIOUS.”

            We also visited the Temple of Heaven, where we got to do Tai Chi, as well as toured the Summer Palace and the Forbidden City, which was probably my favorite part (and NOT just because I have to write a paper about it.) We also had the opportunity to see a Chinese acrobatics show which absolutely BLEW. MY. MIND. Ask me to show you the videos some time. Another highlight was the Oriental Pearl Market, which did have pearls but really should have been called the Oriental Knockoff and Cheap Electronics Market. It was here that I bartered for a pair of Beats by Dre headphones for $30 (retail in the US ~$300). Here’s the catch…it was with a pregnant lady. She was actually really nice and we exchanged some banter before settling on a price but I still can’t help but feel like there’s a special level of hell reserved for people who barter with pregnant women. We also saw the Water Cube and the Bird’s Nest from the Beijing Olympics before we left for Xi’an.

            After flying to Xi’an we saw the Terra Cotta Warriors, an impressive display of an emperor having a huge ego (a common theme in China.) We also walked on the Xi’an wall, which survives from the time when every city in China had a protective wall around it. We thought we were going to continue our adventure to Shanghai but the pilot (or maybe the plane) had other plans. My mom’s description pretty much sums it up…we began to thunder down the runway when all of a sudden the pilot threw the flaps up and hit the brakes before swerving off the runway. After awhile in the airport we were shuttled to our hotelshack. The toilets didn’t really work, the beds were rock solid, and the TV couldn’t be resuscitated. This is also where we encountered the second AWESOME translation on a laundry card:

 “Guest of Respect, Hou do you do! If you need to do laundry to pleases to pack the clothes in to do laundry bag and put on the baggage cabinet. This does laundry bag to belong to guest house repeated usage, if you purchase conduct and actions memorial, please with 8100 or 8140 guest room service counter contact.”

 I’m not sure what the relationship is between laundry and memorials but I’m not sure I want to find out.

I skipped breakfast the next morning and we went back to the Xi'an airport for our flight to Shanghai, take two. I was really disappointed I missed all that Shanghai had to offer, but we still got the best views in the city on our exit (one of the benefits of being on a ship.) My mother returned home safely though with a nice souvenir that she transferred to me. I’m just now recovering from my battle with pneumonia and bronchitis but I wasn’t about to let that affect my plans for Japan. Speaking of Japan…