Vietnam

Well boys and girls, it’s official. I’ve put it off long enough. I’ve run out of excuses. No longer can I blame it on only having 2 days between ports or having too much to do. Even my mother has posted on my blog more recently than I have. So, without further ado, here it is.

To reach Ho Chi Minh City (some of you fossils might remember it as Saigon) we had to travel about 3 hours up a river, strategically planned to occur at high tide or else we could have gotten stuck. I’m pretty sure the pilot was either really angry or just an adrenaline junkie because we did the equivalent of an e-brake parallel park right behind an oil tanker. I’m not kidding, this dude didn’t ease off the throttle at all. We missed the ship by about 10 feet which, in boating terms, is slightly more than the width of a hair. Upon arrival we were greeted by a group of Vietnamese women in traditional garb with a sign that said “Semester at Sea Welcome to Vietnam.” After touring the city for a bit, John and I decided to visit the War Remnants Museum (formerly the Museum of American Atrocities…that should give you an idea of the two-sided nature of the information…) To get there, we hopped on the back of two motorcycles and paid the guys a buck each for a nice open-air jaunt through the city streets…and some of the sidewalks too.

            The museum was…heavy. Parts were cool (several restored tanks, howitzers, gunships and fighter jets), parts were shocking (the exhibit on Agent Orange, which was staffed by volunteers with disabilities from the chemical), and parts were angering. At the same time, though, it was hard not to feel like the enemy. There were a lot of Europeans there (this would become a theme) and it was hard to think that they weren’t looking down on us just a little bit, as we both stood in front of a picture of an American soldier carrying the torso of a Vietnamese fighter and nothing else.

            We needed a pick-me-up after the museum, which in this case meant a trip around the city crossing every street we could find. Now let me explain…crossing the street in Vietnam is not like crossing the street anywhere else in the world. First of all, it is referred to as the “Motorcycle Capital of the World.” Also, there are few to no crosswalks. So the strategy is this: start walking at a slow but sustained pace. Most of them will go around you. Yes, most. There’s this fun little thing called the Saigon Kiss that happens when the muffler of a bike burns you on the way past. Anyway, John and I turned this into a game (for the sake of my mom and my girlfriend, this is why I waited awhile to write this post) and found the busiest intersections we possibly could and took videos. Ah, fun the Vietnamese way.

            My flight for Cambodia left the next day and before long we were on our way to dinner, which included a traditional Cambodian dance show. If you’ve ever been to Hawaii, it was similar to those luaus that many hotels do, with buffet-style food and a “cultural” show. That was the point when I realized just how many Europeans travel to SE Asia. Maybe they’re on to something? The next morning we toured Angkor Wat at sunrise, along with the rest of Cambodia. Honestly it was not quite as spectacular as the Taj Mahal at sunrise, but the colors of the sky were far superior. It was also difficult getting a picture without a thousand people in it, but that’s when being 6’7” comes in handy. After Angkor Wat, we traveled to several different temples in the area, including one often referred to as the “Tomb Raider Temple” for the huge trees whose roots have weaved in and out of the walls and towers. One thing we found interesting was how much freedom visitors were given…security was nowhere to be found. We were free to climb and touch anything we damn well pleased. No way would that happen in the states. This was also the place where we dubbed Cambodia “The Land of the…Dollar?” in reference to EVERYTHING costing $1. Beads, shirts, books…$1. Another interesting tidbit…American dollars are the unofficial currency of Cambodia. The official currency is the Rial, but Cambodian ATMs dispense USDs. The customs officials require USDs to obtain a Visa. And, of course, hawkers on the street prefer …well, USD's. But expect to get your change back in Rial. Wait, what?

            In the afternoon we went back to Angkor Wat for the official tour, and we arrived to a torrential downpour. No matter, you only get one chance to visit the most spectacular temple in the world, so we marched on. It actually drove many away, so it was less crowded than the morning sesh. The rain had also cooled the stifling heat, despite adding to the already-oppressive humidity. The temple was beautiful, and the views from the top tower were breath-taking. One of the highlights was a room that didn’t echo for a shout, a hand-clap or a foot-stomp, but reverberated like a drum when the chest was hit. This was because the ancient cultures in Cambodia believed that hitting the chest released negative emotions…don’t ask me how they built it. It’s definitely something that must be heard to be believed.

            On our final day in Cambodia we visited the Cambodian Landmine Museum, which was started by one man who has singlehandedly unearthed 50,000 mines. It is now run by an American Vietnam War vet and has also turned into an orphanage for children who have lost parents to landmines. In the States we have no reason to think about landmines, but there are still hundreds of thousands in Cambodia and Vietnam. Children still get blown up almost daily walking to school through the jungle. It’s hard to believe that the government, any government, would allow this to happen. But I guess we’re not in Kansas anymore… That afternoon we toured a floating village on Tonley Sap lake, which required a 2-hour bus ride through flooded dirt roads to get to. But it was worth it, as we motored through a floating basketball court, a floating club complete with thumping music, and even an alligator farm. All the while little boys in boats with their fathers would pull up alongside ours with boxes of canned beverages to sell before hopping back onto their boat. One child even hopped on and started giving back massages. He made $2 which doesn’t sound like a lot until you realize that the average income for an adult in Cambodia is $50/month. After arriving back on shore we were greeted by people trying to sell us dinner plates with our faces on them. Some were persuaded into buying only to realize they were just stickers placed on the plates. And they cost $3. Suckers.

            Back in ‘Nam we decided to ascend to the 49^th floor of the tallest tower, the Bitexco Financial Tower, for sprawling views of the city.  We were the only ones up there (it had just opened for the morning) so we each got our own Vietnamese tour guide who told us all about the new tunnel and the market in what can only be described as a step below broken English. But they reflected the hospitality that we had become used to in Vietnam. Never in my life have I visited a country where every single person I meet is as nice as they were in Vietnam. Even in the market I accidently hit a stack of tea cups with my backpack and out of nowhere came three Vietnamese men to catch all the cups I couldn’t get before helping me stack them all back up again. I feel like in America, they would have stared at me and said “sucks to be you, kid.” But maybe I’m a cynic.

            That afternoon we went to the Saigon Zoo, simultaneously one of the shittiest and greatest zoos I’ve ever visited in my life. The cages were bare, the smell was awful, and the animals could not stop doing awesome things! I fed an elephant a stalk of sugar cane, watched lions have sex, saw the fattest bear to have ever lived and got a water bottle thrown at me by an agitated chimpanzee. By far the best 60 cents I’ve spent in quite some time. Even though the ship left the next morning (the tides again), we had to be on-board that night but I wished we could have stayed in Vietnam even longer. I was incredibly surprised how much I enjoyed it. I think many of my negative feelings stemmed from how everything we know relates to the War, but it really is a beautiful country full of beautiful people. I would recommend it to absolutely anybody.